On The Side

So, I was a witness to a conversation between a group of six friends and they were discussing being a side chick. The conversation was kicked off by one of them asking if any of them had been a side chick before, and I was somewhat intrigued by what followed.

Two of them immediately dismissed the idea, wanting nothing to do with it. I could see that one of them had done it, and by the look on her face, it was something she would rather forget ever doing.

However it’s the one girl who was enthusiastic about the whole thing who really got things going. She admitted that not only had she done it before, but that she was still someone’s side chick.

Appalled, one of the previous two non-side chicks proceeded to ask her how she could live with herself knowing that she was a homewrecker, and this girl proudly stated that for as long as the main didn’t know about her, then nothing was getting wrecked.

Perplexed, I sat there wondering how many girls like her out there thought the same. Hell, I wondered how many guys with side chicks felt the same. She was so confident in what she was saying that I was pretty convinced that she couldn’t possibly be the only one to think like that.

The friend who started the conversation, now as intrigued as I was, went on to ask her about what it is that makes being a side chick so worth it, and what this girl had to say next had me questioning a whole lot of things about relationships.

She went on to point out that she basically gets the ‘benefits of a stress-free nigga’. Confused, the other non-side chick asked what she meant by that, and the girl was more than happy to offer an explanation.

It was interesting for me to learn that in a relationship, main chicks apparently stress a guy out so much that the side chick’s job is basically to be the non-stressful version of the main chick and get rewarded for it.

This girl explained that main chicks are always causing fights in the relationships, always instruct the guy on how he should be spending his money, are always fussy and almost always stingy with sex, and they are not adventurous- all of which side chicks are.

To say I was astonished would be putting it lightly.

Of the six, four of them seemed to be just as taken aback as I was by what this girl had revealed, while the fifth just laughed at the absurdity of the whole thing. The girl who started the topic went on to ask this girl if she ever felt any remorse about any of what she’d just admitted.

I’m pretty sure you can guess what this girl ended up saying.

I stopped listening in on the conversation but it lingered in my mind and really got me thinking about the dating game nowadays. Are things so bad that instead of putting up with the good and the bad in a relationship, you’d rather have two people with whom you choose to split the two sides with?

What bothered even more was this view of the main chick. What kind of disrespectful human being are you to look at someone and think of them as so much of a pain in your life that you get someone else to make you forget about this person, while not letting go of them?

I feel like we are honestly living in the times of cowards if that’s the case. The fact that you’d rather waste my time than tell me to my face that you find me irritating, boring or a prude is just disrespectful and downright cowardly.

Where’s the respect for not just people’s feelings but people’s time too?

One thought on “On The Side

  1. Interesting read. Sadly so its the society we live in. This goes back to the 80/20 rule. Where you cant leave your 80% (main chick) as you have a history and she being your support system through it all. And of course she knows you better, But when things are not well in you lean on the 20% that you can pretend with she doesn’t know you and can never judge or reprimand your decisions hence they are called stress relievers. I have been a side chick once (wasn’t aware until later on into it) and trust me when I say I will never ever do it again and I let go of the guy and it was hard as I had caught feelings.

    Liked by 1 person

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